Category Archives: Auditions

MIDDLE CLASS MILLIONAIRES
A New Play by Darin Hart

Directed by Brett Price

Performances March 4-6, 2022
Rehearsal Period: Feb. 3 – March 3, 2022

Audition Requirements:

• 60 second comedic monologue, headshot, and resume
• Seeking actors 18+ (must play characters ages 20-60)
• Video submissions due Friday, Jan. 28
  (please submit to kincaidstage@gmail.com)
• In person auditions Thursday, Jan. 27, 6pm-7:30pm

MIDDLE CLASS MILLIONAIRES

SYNOPSIS:
A GROUP OF MIDDLE CLASS, SUBURBIA FRIENDS GATHER ON THE NORMALLY QUIET CUL-DE-SAC TO DISCUSS THE DAILY GOINGS ON OF THEIR LIVES AND NEIGHBORHOOD. THREE MEN DISCUSS A RECENT NEWS STORY ABOUT HOW A PRICELESS PAINTING WAS RECENTLY STOLEN FROM A MUSEUM AND THE CULPRITS WERE BELIEVED TO BE HIDING OUT IN THE AREA WAITING TO UNLOAD THE PAINTING TO A BLACK-MARKET DEALER.

THE MUSEUM IS OFFERING A $3 MILLION REWARD FOR ITS SAFE RETURN, NO QUESTIONS ASKED. THE MEN HAVE A CLUE AS TO WHERE THE PAINTING MAY BE HID AND CONSPIRE TO STEAL IT FROM THE CROOKS IN ORDER TO CLAIM THE REWARD.

THE WOMEN ARE ALSO DISCUSSING THE NEWS REPORT AND UNBEKNOWNST TO THE MEN, THEY TOO ARE CONSPIRING TO STEAL THE PAINTING. NEITHER GROUP WANTS THE OTHER TO KNOW FOR FEAR OF RIDICULE AND BECAUSE THEY EACH HAVE THEIR OWN PLANS FOR THE REWARD MONEY.

AS EACH GROUP MAKE THEIR PLANS, THEY ARE CLUELESS THAT THEY MAY COME HEAD TO HEAD AS EACH OTHER’S ADVERSARIES.

MEANWHILE, THE ACTUAL CROOKS ARE MAKING THEIR PLANS TO RETRIEVE THE HIDDEN PAINTING IN ORDER TO SELL IT ON THE BLACK MARKET.

CAST OF CHARACTERS

STEWART KINGSMAN: SHIFT MANAGER AT A DISTRIBUTION PLANT. AGE 35-55 DEDICATED WORKER AND A SELF-PROCLAIMED EXPERT ON MOST EVERYTHING. HE ENJOYS TAKING CHARGE AND TELLING PEOPLE WHAT TO DO IN ALMOST EVERY SITUATION. WHILE HE IS A SELF-PROCLAIMED EXPERT, HIS EXPERTISE IS OFTEN MISDIRECTED. HE IS MARRIED TO STELLA AND THEY HAVE TWO KIDS IN HIGH SCHOOL, BERT AND ALEX.

EDWARD BITTENGER: BANK MANAGER AT THE COMMON SENSE BANK. AGE 35-55 A BIT NERDY AND HIGH STRUNG. HE IS VERY CAUTIOUS, NOT A RISK TAKER AND IS DEPENDABLE TO A FAULT. HE IS LOYAL TO HIS FAMILY AND FRIENDS. HE IS MARRIED TO SHEILA AND THEY HAVE ONE CHILD WHO IS APPLYING FOR COLLEGE, HER NAME IS CHLOE.

DALE RAISON (REE-SON)- AGE 20’S DALE IS A NEW DRIVER FOR A SHIPPING COMPANY. LIKES TO BRAG ABOUT HOW FAST HE DOES HIS ROUTE AND LIKES TO SHARE STORIES ABOUT ALL THE PEOPLE HE MEETS ALONG THE WAY. DALE LIKES HANGING OUT WITH HIS FRIENDS, LIVES ABOVE THE GARAGE AT HIS PARENTS HOUSE AND IS NOT QUITE READY TO VENTURE OUT ON HIS OWN. HE IS DATING A GIRL WHO IS A BANK TELLER AT ED’S BANK THAT HE MET WHILE MAKING A DELIVERY. DALE IS A LITTLE AWKWARD AROUND THE LADIES AND IS MORE OF A FOLLOWER THAN A LEADER.

STELLA KINGSMAN: A STAY AT HOME MOM, ACTIVE IN THE PTA, DEFINITELY IN CHARGE OF THE DOMICILE. A VERY NO NON-SENSE KIND OF WOMAN, STRONG, INDEPENDENT AND NOT AFRAID TO VOICE HER OPINION. BOTH HER AND STEWART HAVE STRONG PERSONALITIES BUT STEWART IS DEFINITELY KING, WHEN SHE IS NOT AT HOME. STELLA IS A FAN OF CRIME SHOWS AND IS PURSUING AN ONLINE DEGREE IN CRIMINOLOGY IN HOPES OF ONE DAY BECOMING A PRIVATE DETECTIVE.

SHEILA BITTENGER: SHEILA IS A HAIRDRESSER AND RUNS HER OWN SHOP THAT ONCE SERVED AS THEIR GARAGE. SHEILA IS A MILD MANNERED, PLEASANT WOMAN. SHE IS TYPICALLY SOFT SPOKEN AND IS RELATIVELY CONTENT WITH HER LIFE ALTHOUGH SHE TENDS TO DAY DREAM OF ROMANCE. WHILE HER DEMEANOR MAY SUGGEST SHE IS A BIT SHEEPISH, HER WIT CAN BE RAZOR SHARP AND THERE IS JUST ENOUGH MYSTERY TO SUGGEST THERE IS MUCH MORE TO HER THAN MEETS THE EYE.

LILLY MAYWEATHER: LILLY IS A BANK TELLER AT THE COMMON SENSE BANK. LILLY’S MAIN FOCUS IS FALLING IN LOVE AND STARTING A FAMILY. SHE IS INTERESTED IN LOVE AND BEING IN LOVE AND THINKS THAT THERE IS NO BETTER THING ON EARTH THAN TO BE IN LOVE. SHE IS A BIT OF A GOSSIP AND WHILE CAPABLE AT HER JOB, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO WONDER IF THE ELEVATOR GOES ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP.

ROCKO BEASLEY: ROCKO SPENT HIS YOUTH ON THE STREETS. ANYONE CAN SEE HIS SEEDY SIDE FROM FIRST GLIMPSE. HE IS DISTANT WITH A QUIET BUT ANGRY PERSONA. LITTLE IS KNOWN ABOUT HIS PAST OR HIS DAILY ROUTINE. HE MENTORS HIS YOUNGER BROTHER BUT HAS CONCERNS ABOUT HIS CAPABILITIES.

BUDDY BEASLEY: ROCKO’S YOUNGER BROTHER. BUDDY TRIED TO WALK THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW BUT HE WAS DESTINED TO FOLLOW IN HIS OLDER BROTHER’S STEPS. ROCKO GIVES THE ORDERS AND BUDDY IS EAGER IS PLEASE HIM. BUDDY IS HYPER, JUMPY, ACT FIRST AND THINK SECOND KIND OF GUY. HE WORKS PART TIME AT H20-2-G0 DELIVERING BOTTLED WATER TO LOCAL BUSINESSES.

WINSTON POLEIACK: LOCAL POLICE DETECTIVE: VERY DRY, MATTER OF FACT. TREATS EVERYONE AS A SUSPECT AND IS A SELF-PROCLAIMED DEFENDER OF JUSTICE.

WHITNEY CAROUSEL: MUSEUM CURATOR: ARTSY AND REFINED AND A STRANGER TO ANYTHING HUMOROUS.

OPHELIA SPICE: ENTERTAINER AT THE PINK POSEY. LOW AMBITION, AIRHEAD WHO ENJOYS LOOKING NICE AND GETTING COMPLIMENTS. SHE DOES NOT APPEAR TO BE OVERLY INTELLIGENT.

ASSISTANT 1 & 2: NON DESCRIPT CHARACTERS THAT SERVE IN A SUPPORTING ROLE

BARTENDER: NON DESCRIPT CHARACTER-NON SPEAKING ROLE

PINK POSEY DANCER: NON SPEAKING ROLE

GINGER SPICE: OPHELIA’S MOM

SPORTING GOODS SALES PERSON: ALL BUSINESS, BURLEY TYPE CHARACTER, NO NONSENSE.

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